The holidays are my favorite time of the year. I love what the season represents. I love giving gifts, helping others and being with family and friends. It had always been a special time for me. Yet, that wasn't the case a couple years ago. My son was only a couple months old and I … Continue reading Surviving the Holidays with Postpartum Depression and Anxiety
In September, my psychiatrist agreed that I was finally ready to wean off of my antidepressant. I had been doing very well, and have since fully recovered from Postpartum Depression and Anxiety. My therapist echoed the sentiment, citing numerous recent visits where I had shown tremendous improvement. I felt better and more confident than I … Continue reading Weaning Off My Antidepressant
I remember how I felt back then. I've detailed them in so many different blog entries. I was so scared of being a bad mother - not knowing what to do, not caring enough for my son, even wondering if I was good enough to be anyone's mother. I was afraid that I would never … Continue reading Two Years Later
The beginning was hard. Every week, I went to the support group. I couldn't bring my son with me. I was fearful of being anywhere outside of the home with him. I felt like I had no control. I felt broken and lost. I cried at every session. I was confused. Who had I become? … Continue reading Was I at Risk for Postpartum Depression?
I look at the picture with both feelings of nostalgia and pain. At the time, I had only been a mother for all of two months. I had no idea what I was doing, and I was scared most of the time. And yet, there I was, in a simple photo with a small smile, … Continue reading Not the Favorite
It was a year and a half ago, but I remember looking in the mirror. Tears streamed down my face. My hair was a mess. My clothes were a mess - I think my nursing tank was on backwards. My eyes spoke volumes. I was tired. I was stressed. I was anxious. I was scared. … Continue reading reflection
I have never been a fan of medication. I liked the idea that you can take a small pill to take away a temporary headache or pain. But those things were short term and never routine. Anything over a one time event meant something else to me. It meant a permanent problem. Thus, I incorrectly … Continue reading Just a Bit Longer
After the recommendation was given, I sat in silence. I didn't want to believe what the doctor was saying. I heard both good and bad things, but after all that I've been through, I didn't want to face another failure or painful thing. A couple agonizing months had already passed. I could do this no … Continue reading Speak Up!
Around this time last year, I felt like I needed something new. I was still recovering from Postpartum Depression and Anxiety. Still, I had made great strides in my recovery. I was able to talk about my feelings with less fear. I had found a great therapist who was teaching me new coping skills. I … Continue reading The First Year
It seemed so unfair. I was finally making progress with my recovery from Postpartum Depression and Anxiety. I was finally starting to enjoy motherhood. Yet, I had to leave that all behind and go back to being in the corporate world. It’s hard to believe, but a year ago today, I went back to work … Continue reading 365 Days